New Life, New Beginning
My last blog on here was from March of 2007. Just over two years ago, and yet it seems like eons. So much has changed, and I'm not going to get into all of that right now; it's not as if I could ever forget anyway. We are still a family of five, my daughters and I, although it's a different dynamic--I am a single mom again, and my husband was replaced by my adorable little baby Julia. We still live in Newton Falls, but in one half of a little duplex, and I am working as I had planned, but not in the criminal justice system, but as a nursing assistant. I heard someone say once that the best way to make God laugh is to tell Him your plans. I think that's what I did. You know what though? I don't feel angry or bitter or resentful with God; I am praising Him every day, more than ever. Yes, tragedy happened to us, but it brought us closer together (my girls and I, that is) and taught me humbleness and humility. He taught me to swallow my pride and accept help, and He showed me that through Christ I really can do all things. I felt so weak, so dependent on Ed, so unsure of myself, but after that crisis I realized that I can be strong--but only with God's guidance. The faith I have in Him now is just amazing. He truly is my rock, my foundation, that I have built my "new life" on. I love to pray, I love to praise Him, I love to sing to Him! I have found myself while I'm praying sometimes just bursting out in songs of praise. It's wonderful! I truly know what it is to love God now.
And as for this "new life" that He has given me, in every way, it's much different than what I had envisioned for myself, but I am loving it. Being a single mom is not always easy, but my daughters are wonderful, and anyway I'm not truly a single mom--my daughters have the best Father ever. I tell them that too. I remind them that just because they don't have a dad physically present with them, they are daughters of the King, the greatest Father there is. It's not always easy for them either I know, and I am so proud of them for how they have adjusted. And then there's Julia; she is just a joy to us all! God truly blessed us with that little baby girl. She is sunshine and smiles, she is love. I'm crying as I'm writing this because I feel so happy, so loved by God. I knew salvation before, but I did not know the joy of truly giving my life to Him. I would like to list all the miracles He has blessed us with in the last year and a half, but that would take a while and it's getting late so I will save that for another time. But here is one of the most special and recent, and that is my job. I felt so sad, so torn about having to go to work and not be able to stay home with Julia the way I did with Erin. And I was also very anxious about finding a job at all with the economy the way it is. Then I found out about the STNA classes at the Red Cross, and I signed up. Six weeks later I graduated and had my first job interview two days later. I got the job, and better yet, I am able to work three 12-hour shifts, midnights. That means that for most of the week I am home with my daughters. No day-care for Julia, no coming home to an empty house for TJ, Karry, & Erin. I am just over-joyed! And I love the work that I am doing. I love caring for people, trying to help them be comfortable, trying to help them feel well. God has blessed me, and is using me to help others, and I am so glad. He has made me glad!
And as for this "new life" that He has given me, in every way, it's much different than what I had envisioned for myself, but I am loving it. Being a single mom is not always easy, but my daughters are wonderful, and anyway I'm not truly a single mom--my daughters have the best Father ever. I tell them that too. I remind them that just because they don't have a dad physically present with them, they are daughters of the King, the greatest Father there is. It's not always easy for them either I know, and I am so proud of them for how they have adjusted. And then there's Julia; she is just a joy to us all! God truly blessed us with that little baby girl. She is sunshine and smiles, she is love. I'm crying as I'm writing this because I feel so happy, so loved by God. I knew salvation before, but I did not know the joy of truly giving my life to Him. I would like to list all the miracles He has blessed us with in the last year and a half, but that would take a while and it's getting late so I will save that for another time. But here is one of the most special and recent, and that is my job. I felt so sad, so torn about having to go to work and not be able to stay home with Julia the way I did with Erin. And I was also very anxious about finding a job at all with the economy the way it is. Then I found out about the STNA classes at the Red Cross, and I signed up. Six weeks later I graduated and had my first job interview two days later. I got the job, and better yet, I am able to work three 12-hour shifts, midnights. That means that for most of the week I am home with my daughters. No day-care for Julia, no coming home to an empty house for TJ, Karry, & Erin. I am just over-joyed! And I love the work that I am doing. I love caring for people, trying to help them be comfortable, trying to help them feel well. God has blessed me, and is using me to help others, and I am so glad. He has made me glad!
posted by Amy @ 2:02 AM
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